More Sir Charles WISDOM!!!

Mardi Gras: Mission Impossible?

Unless you reside in New Orleans or Las Vegas, last night probably went for you like this: You follow some friends into a bar that is decorated in beads hanging from the light fixtures, some people wearing green, purple or gold masks with feathers attached. You smack yourself on the forehead and say “Oh shit, I forgot its Mardi Gras”. After you’ve ordered a drink and tried to sneak some beads as your friends won’t let you start shamelessly start flashing (at the moment), you start to wonder “What would it be like to be in New Orleans right now for Titmas, the most boobilicious holiday ever? Man I’d like to go!” Now if you’re single and have the freedom you may be heading for the next flight. But if you’re like the rest of us, guys with women in their lives, you’re slammed with a reality check: how can you convince your lady to approve of Mardi Gras??? Do you lie and not tell her were you are? Doable but tricky with massive risks. Do you pretend to not know that Mardi Gras is happening at that time? Very hard to fake, and even if she does believe you didn’t know, that doesn’t mean you’re allowed out the front door. Do you offer for her to come? I tried this approach with another socially risqué event in the past, trying to get my girl to come with me to share a once in a lifetime experience. Despite the fact that I was genuine in wanting to go with her, she couldn’t have had less interest for a list of reasons. Sometimes you get lucky with a diamond in the ruff, or otherwise known as a “down-ass-chick” who just wants to live it up and experiment, but for the most part girls are not going to be jumping at the idea of being in sexually explicit areas. You may have a shot if its something that would be just as pleasing for her as it would be for you, but I’m curious how you’re going to pitch the concept of how drunk women flashing will be pleasing to her. Caution, she may think that you want her to flash, which is a whole other shit spiral to hell. There’s the off chance of negotiating you being allowed to experience this will reward her the privilege of her doing something you hate. Though it is likely that displeasure of you going to Mardi Gras will outweigh her desire for something else. The only other possibility I could possibility is an impressive performance of reverse psychology. It would have to begin with you having the event brought to her attention by a source other than you (a friend suggesting it or an advertisement). You should maybe acknowledge it, possibly be briefly humorous about it but not express any desire in it. The goal then is for her to bring it up, as she’s trying to bait you. Don’t make it out like you’re interested still, though jokingly play it off like you knew she’d never go to such a thing. It’s a dare, and let’s see if she’s a hot enough chick to go for it. When she first says she’ll show you and that she wants to go, still play the disbelief card and that you’re sure she doesn’t have it in her, that she’ll freak like a fish out of water in a place like that. When you’re down there and when you return from a glorious vacation to tigobitties heaven, be as appreciative as hell to her, giving her credit that will make her feel proud cause that’s one down-ass-chick. Now…on the flip side, if she doesn’t bring it up or go for the dare, take my advice and LEAVE IT BE. You can visit a museum, surrounded by amazing art to gaze at with puppy dog eyes, but you’re not allowed to touch…or you can go to your own studio and be an artist.

~Sir Charles~